Wednesday, October 20, 2010

Me Punching People

It’s been a while since I’ve written blah blah blah.  Whatever.  School started and has been kicking my ass since August.  My ass hurts.

So, here’s the juice: Today, while waiting in the hallway for my Spanish Lit class to start, I was talking to a few of my classmates.  Both nice girls, about 19 or so, Spanish Education majors, and they seem to be educated and regularly contribute to class, so… they seemed cool is what I’m trying to say. 

However, today, in the hallway, Girl 1 asked me if Spanish was my major.  I told her it was my second major and that English was my first.  She then told me that her brother is considering changing his major to English and their parents are really worried.  I’m in the middle of telling her that it is extremely common for parents to worry about their English major children when Girl 2 interrupts:

“Well, doesn’t the English major prepare you for, like, secretarial work?” 

That was her contribution to the conversation.  And, this is why parents worry about their kids choosing to be English Majors.  They don’t believe that there are any other opportunities other than secretarial work or teaching (that’s not even English majors, that’s Education majors).  Now, as a side note, there is nothing wrong with secretarial work and I’m sure I’d be happy to secure a secretarial job after graduation, especially with the economy and the job market being the way they are right now.  However, Girl 2’s tone in addition to the content of her assertion truly pissed me off. 

What did I do?  I punched her in the face.  Then I corrected her grammar.

Okay, so maybe I didn’t punch her.  I did deadpan her, though.  Then I replied, “Well, that’s what the mean side of my family says to me about my major, but it’s not true.  Especially since for a lot of secretarial work, a college degree is unnecessary.  It would be unfortunate to spend all this money to go to school to get a job that may have been available to me pre-college.” 

This response may be a little better worded than what I said in the moment, but you get the idea.  Plus, you weren’t there...you’ll never know.  In fact, I didn’t even say any of that.  I just punched her in the face.

After she recovered from my mean right hook, she said, “Oh, I guess that’s not right.  No.”  I’m assuming she was referencing her earlier assumption. 

Girl 1 jumped back in and asked me what her brother should do if he’s an English major and also if I was planning on going to graduate school.  Another classmate walked up and they both turn and talk to her in the middle of me answering Girl 1’s questions.  About 3 minutes later, Girl 2, whose black eye was starting to show, turned to me and said, “Ok, you can finish telling us about your major and grad school now.”

Oh really, skank?  I have your permission to continue talking to you?  Thank you so much. 

I punched her again. 

That’s it.  That was my day today.  It was a good day and inspired me to write this post.  Normally, I’m not this violent (even though I punch people in real life and in my dreams), but sometimes life just calls for it, ya know?

Upcoming news:  Me, the hubs, 2 groomsmen, and a best friend are all going to the Rally to Restore Sanity on October 30, 2010, in D.C.  It’s so fucking exciting.  Though I feel I may be a little too crazy to attend, I’ll try to tone it down a notch that day.  I’ll post pictures (hopefully) after we come back.   

2 comments:

  1. i used to get,

    "you're an art major? Do you want to be a teacher? or work at strabucks."

    granted, I did both of those things, but now i run a silk screen shop and make t-shirts and other fancy stuff.

    I'll bet you got a mean right hook.

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  2. Haha! This is great. I love your encounters with the intellectually challenged. It makes for great entertainment! I know you run into alot of these people and I'm dying to read more!

    P.S. You can stay at our place in DC. Mallik would love the company!

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